The ketchup packet theory of repression is really an old concept. Consider that repression occurs when we push things down. We don’t have the difficult conversations that we know we should. We let things slide when we know we should resolve them. We fail to correct staff, clients, or kids. We don’t do what we need to do. All examples of repression.
The ketchup packet theory goes as follows: When I was a boy, a trip to McDonald’s meant a happy meal, certainly not as elaborate as they are today. There was, however, always ketchup for the fries. As a young creative, I opened the ketchup packet by squeezing and squeezing, until a long stream of ketchup would cover the fries with the design of my choosing. One day, in squeezing and squeezing that pack, instead of ketchup landing on my fries, it exploded on my mother. I assure you, that happy meal was no longer a happy meal.
The analogy between squeezing and squeezing that packet and repression is that in both cases, the pressure begins and continues to increase. I knew that based on probability, the ketchup would land on my fries and it almost always did, but there was always that chance of it going where it shouldn’t. We think we can control repression or suppression; however, when it rears its head, it’s often at the wrong time and place and in the worst of circumstances.
Similarly, “a stitch in time is worth nine.” It’s always better to attack problems when they’re small and easier to fix. It’s easier to conquer a molehill than it is a mountain. Moreover, it’s often when we have the difficult conversations that we gain clarity. Remember that our minds always create shortcuts. Whatever it is that you avoid addressing with another person is often trivial to them. In fact, they may not even care, especially not to the degree your mind believes it to be true. However, the blow back that can occur because of repression can be exponentially dangerous… far worse than my ketchup-coated mother.
When you repress and suppress anything long enough, it will find an outlet. In politics and government, the right to protest can provide the needed outlet to avoid becoming a revolution. Look back at history. Revolutions never simply exploded. There was always pressure leading up to them. Letting off steam, if you will, is a matter of being heard and being understood. Once you’re heard and understood, your own mindset changes. Failure to communicate (or protest) drives ideas and concepts into your subconscious. The result is that you will begin to find evidence to support that which you believe to be true. Once that happens, you begin to stack it.
In business, there are many times when conversations that need to be had with partners, staff members, and clients don’t happen. You avoid them because you don’t want conflict or confrontation. Once repressed and pushed down, your mind is going to begin to find more and more evidence to support whatever you believe to be true, accurate or not. It’s called confirmation bias.
As complex creatures with associative memories, we are always collecting more and more evidence to support what we believe. Confirmation bias is always at play. It continues to grow until it explodes at the wrong place and time.
However, if things can work for bad, they can also work for good. If you have a compelling goal or design, and you continue to keep it top of mind, confirmation bias also works in your favor, and lo and behold, opportunities begin to present themselves and compounding occurs. The goal manifests because your mind was accumulating evidence to support it and seek the design.
Think about a client you’ve had that you didn’t like. We all have them, and we can pretend we like them and be professional in serving them. The funny thing is that there’s a really strong probability that they don’t like you either. Even as a polished professional, are you really going to go out of your way for the client you don’t like? Are they going to be your first call when you get a great idea? Rhetorical questions. I know the answer is no.
That brings up the question as to why you continue to have them as a client. I am certain that if you dig deep enough, you’ll discover the answer lies in a difficult conversation that never happened. It lies in repression. Maybe they didn’t take your advice, didn’t keep their appointment, or randomly showed up at your office and expected immediate attention and service. At some point, they violated the way you do business, and instead of addressing it immediately, you repressed it.
Have those difficult conversations, with clients, staff, spouse, and kids, sooner than later. Don’t let the ketchup packet explode.
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