Sometimes you find yourself or your clients in a state of overwhelm. There’s so much stuff to do. And when there are so many things to do, it then begins to feel like you can’t do anything. You or your client get stuck or frozen. The thing about the feeling of overwhelm is that it becomes a tool or excuse for procrastination. Overwhelm can also be the result of fatigue or the massive inbound stimuli.
If you’re dealing with a client in a state of overwhelm, we sometimes have to shock them out of the mental state they’re in. It’s a matter of reminding them that they’re being mentally lazy. “What do you mean I’m lazy? I have a lot going on!” To which your response should be, “Of course you do, but I’m telling you you’re mentally lazy because you are forgetting or ignoring the importance of discernment.”
The law of unequal distribution applies to all things, all places, all the time. Very simply, nothing can be equally important. There is always a priority. Note the singular in that word: priority, not priorities. You have to help your client get back to the ability to think about and discern what really is most important.
Overwhelm also happens to us as advisors when we fail to plan, fail to work our calendars, or allow interruption to our calendar. Once we enter the state of overwhelm, stress comes right along with it. Cortisol levels rise and our moods decline. You feel under pressure and believe you have to rush. As stress increases, intelligence decreases. Simple equation! We begin to make dumb statements and errors. As I’ve said before, there’s nothing wrong with being dumb, but you must deal with the consequences of that.
Overwhelm is a failure to prioritize. When you or your client are overwhelmed, stop and wake up to what really is important. Be critically aware of the procrastination that comes with overwhelm and stress: “I have so much to do, I can’t (or won’t) do anything.” Obviously, this is never effective.
Keep the priority tree in mind (or remind your client of it) when overwhelm rears up. The priority tree is you first, spouse second, kids third, staff fourth, clients fifth, and corporate stuff after that. Also, overwhelm can and often results from fatigue, which is a clear indicator that you (or your client) are not taking care of yourself physically or have fallen into the trap of thinking that the game can be won. With the latter, you are unconsciously competing or trying to get everything done, which is impossible.
Work, itself, is immortal—the more work you do, the more work you get to do. It never stops but instead constantly piles up. I’m not suggesting you throw up your hands and surrender. Instead, I want you to be clear that you can only do what you can do. When you work your priorities and have clarity about what is most impactful, that becomes the most important thing, and all else falls into place. From that, you can gain the results that compound over time.
Here are some numbers I calculated with a client recently regarding the law of unequal distribution. In a 24-hour day, for one percent of the day, we can get 50 percent of the value. It’s 15 minutes. When you get that 15 minutes right or at least guess at the probability stack, you’re playing at an advantage. In a seven-day week, the one percent calculates out to 90 minutes. Ninety minutes of your week will provide 50 percent of all the value for that week. Dial in that 90 minutes and you’re ahead of the curve.
So how do you identify the 15- or 90-minute blocks? The answer lies in discernment. Think. Take an educated guess. Stack your own probabilities. That said, I can almost flat-out guarantee that the 90 minutes in your week that provide value will be related to the triple-A approach (A activities, A people, A places). In a 30-day month to get 50 percent of the value, it’s roughly seven hours. Simply dial in 15 minutes a day where you’re getting value, and you’re playing at a huge advantage. Let’s take one more step, and it’s even scarier: In a 365-day year, one percent is basically 3.5 days.
Keep that in mind and now ask, “How can you really be overwhelmed when 50 percent of the value comes from so little time?” 15 minutes, 90 minutes, seven hours, or 3.5 days. Much like suffering in discontentedness, overwhelm does not exist in the natural world. The trees aren’t overwhelmed, fishes aren’t overwhelmed, grass isn’t overwhelmed. Overwhelm, much like suffering, only occurs in the space between your ears—in your own head. And remember, we are not in the business of live-and-death. Give yourself and have your clients give themselves more grace than they think they deserve.
Consider this: “Be aware that whatever happens, happens to you, by you, through you; that you are the creator, enjoyer, and destroyer of all you perceive, and you will not be afraid.” (Attributed to Nisargadatta Maharaj)
And I’ll contend that neither will you be overwhelmed. It always comes back to your design for yourself and your life and your alignment to that design.
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